Dec
31
2008
6

Lindsay Lohan Has My Grandmother’s Boobs


Oh my God.  How long are Lindsay Lohan’s breasts?  Look at her left boob (not her right one, because she has her right arm raised, and we all know that raises the boob too).  Her left boob is like 10 inches long. Someone her age is supposed to have round, perky boobs–not saggy boobs that hang down to your belly button.  Lindsay Lohan needs a breast lift, especially if she plans on wearing bikinis and not being mistaken for an 80 year old.

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Written by bitching beauty in: Celebrity Boobs | Tags:
Dec
31
2008
5

Jennifer Lopez Likes Bumblebees on Her Lips



Jennifer Lopez appeared at the premiere of “The Curious Case of Benjamin Button” with curiously large lips.  Hmm…looks like the typical “bee stung” look that goes hand in hand with lip augmentation injections (pick your filler of choice: restylane, juvaderm…they all look the same).  See how the upper lip curls out almost unnaturally?  See the perch above her upper lip where someone could plop their fat ass and sit?  That, my friends, is a sign of lip augmentation…especially if a forty year old has it.

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Written by bitching beauty in: Celebrity Plastic Surgery,Good Plastic Surgery | Tags:
Dec
26
2008
1

Amy Smart & Her 5 O’Clock Shadow


Amy Smart?  More like Amy Dumb for leaving home without any sort of cosmetics on her face.  Is it just me or does it look like she has a five o’clock shadow?  Is it possible she has a identical twin (who’s a male) and this is actually the twin’s photograph and not hers?  If not, Amy, honey, use make-up!  Use a lot of it!

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Written by bitching beauty in: Celebrities without Make-Up | Tags:
Dec
26
2008
9

Faith Hill’s Face Needs Ironing


There wasn’t a clear cut category for this hi-res photo of Faith Hill…does it go into the Celebrity Plastic Surgery category or the Ugly Celebrity Body Parts one?  The only thing ugly here are those deep (and numerous) wrinkles on her face…wrinkles don’t really count as a body part.  And, since it doesn’t look like she’s had any plastic surgery action (at least not when this photo was taken), it doesn’t really count as Celebrity Plastic Surgery.  After weighing the pros and cons of each, this photo will reside in the plastic surgery category…why?  Well, because we highly recommend some filler action for Faith Hill (and some Botox).  Fill in those wrinkles!  Faith, you’re looking awfully old awfully young.

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Written by bitching beauty in: Celebrity Plastic Surgery,Needs Plastic Surgery | Tags:
Dec
22
2008
2

Alicia Silverstone Clueless about Make-Up





Hard to believe these pictures are of the same actress who played the lead in the movie, “Clueless.” Alicia Silverstone was gorgeous back in the day. I give her that…she was stunning, beautiful, you name it. After seeing these photos of her, however, I wonder if it was all an illusion with great make-up. Or maybe she’s just aged (and not aged well). Or maybe it’s both? Either way, Alicia Silverstone looks really awful without makeup.  If I didn’t know it was her, I would have thought the first two photos above were pictures of a random crack whore or something.  She looks like she could be best friends with Amy Winehouse.  She doesn’t look so bad in the last two photos, but that mole on her forehead has GOT to go.  There is absolutely no sex appeal about having a mole on your forehead.  Don’t even get me started on her skin…

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Written by bitching beauty in: Celebrities without Make-Up | Tags:
Dec
22
2008
0

Ashley Tisdale & Wacko Jacko



When I first saw this photo of Ashley Tisdale, I swear I thought it was Michael Jackson. When I realized it wasn’t Wacko Jacko, and that it was actually Ashley, I felt really sorry for her. What did her doctor do to her nose? Did she use the same surgeon as MJ? Why doesn’t she get her damn nose fixed again (and this time get the doctor to turn it down a bit)? I hate to say it, but Ashley Tisdale totally looks like Michael Jackson (thanks to her new nose). She looks like a freak show.

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Written by bitching beauty in: Celebrity Look-A-Likes | Tags:
Dec
22
2008
4

Ashley Tisdale without Make-Up… or a Gerbil?



Ashley looks like some sort of rodent without her layers of foundation and eye make-up.  That short, up-turned nose of hers doesn’t help either.  She looks like the pet gerbil I had when I was a little girl.

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Written by bitching beauty in: Celebrities without Make-Up | Tags:
Dec
22
2008
5

Faith Hill Not So Glam without Make-Up




Didn’t I see her at Wal-Mart the other day? It’s just that without her make-up, she looks just like 80% of the other suburban housewives in the United States. Yeah, take away her Maybelline and she ain’t so special.

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Written by bitching beauty in: Celebrities without Make-Up | Tags:
Dec
09
2008
3

Christie Brinkley Being Cast in Batman Sequel



I’m sorry, but there’s always been something really annoying about Christie Brinkley.  I don’t know, but there’s always been something really fake about the image she projects as the perfect woman.  I always had the impression that behind closed doors, she’s a real bitch.  The fact that she’s been married and divorced three times just further encouraged me to believe that she’s some kind of maneater.  Last summer, she was in the news because of her recent divorce from 89th husband, Peter Cook, who cheated on her with an 18 year old.  Anyway, there have been a lot of recent photos of Brinkley floating around, and I couldn’t help but notice just how much she is starting to resemble the Joker from the first Batman movie.  Something about her eyes, her smile…she could totally play the Joker in the next Batman movie.  I heard they are casting for a replacement after Heath Ledger’s untimely demise (may he RIP)…maybe Christie can revive her career afterall.  But seriously, she looks demented in that photograph.

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Written by bitching beauty in: Celebrity Look-A-Likes | Tags:
Dec
05
2008
2

Nicole Kidman: Liar, Liar, Pants on Fire

Nicole Kidman has said in interviews that she has never had plastic surgery…I have two words for her: “My ASS!” No offense to Ms. Kidman, but do you think people are blind? The thing about being a celebrity is that your whole famous life is captured on film or in photos so you can’t really lie about that kind of stuff. I recently saw an old movie of hers on TV and I barely recognized her. It was time, I thought, that her photos show up on bitching beauty, because I have to bitch about people who deny getting cosmetic surgery. These are two photos of Nicole Kidman when she was in that movie I saw (i.e. “Dead Calm”).

Note her lips: thin. Note her eyebrows: low and manly…much like Sam Neil’s eyebrows, actually. Note her jowls in the head-on shot. Now take a look at the following recent photos of her:
nicole kidman after plastic surgery browlift lip augmentation

Compare photos of her at her current age to her younger photos and you will see that I ain’t hallucinating. She’s got some serious work done. Note her lips: much fuller. Nicole Kidman is GUILTY of lip augmentation. It looks like a combination of fillers (like Restylane) and sausage lip implants. Yuck. Note her brows: lifted. It looks like she may have gotten a browlift…it’s been widely speculated that she has Botox injections. I say, there is no way in hell her eyebrows moved up so far on her head just from Botox. I’m not saying that she doesn’t get Botox. Hell, I’d bet half the farm that she gets Botox every week. I’m just saying that it looks like those eyebrows got some surgical help to move up her head. Note her jowls in the head-on shot: gone. Did she have those lipo-ed or what? The shape of her lower face is completely different now.

So, I really hope Nicole Kidman won’t continue lying about never having had any plastic surgery. Seriously, it’s insulting. That’s like Eva Longoria saying that she never wears makeup when she goes out onto the red carpet.

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Written by bitching beauty in: Bad Plastic Surgery,Celebrity Plastic Surgery | Tags: